Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......

I am so tired of being tired!
I am a person that can't go to bed before 10 or 11 pm each night, regardless of when I got up that day. At the beginning of the year I started a paper route which requires me to get up at 3 am. On the average night I now get about 4 hours of sleep. I try to go to bed earlier but can't actually go to sleep until somewhere between 10:30 and midnight and when I get home at about 6am from the route, I am so wired from being on the move for 3 hours that I can't go right back to sleep. Of course by the time I get sleepy my wife and daughters get up for the day which delays rest further.
The upside is that it allows me to stay at home with my daughters. Most parents aren't able to experience this so when I had the opportunity I took it.  
Now, my oldest is getting ready to go to school and the younger one wants to go somewhere during the day. My usefullness as a care provider is coming to an end and it makes me sad and happy.
I will miss spending so much time with them and being there for them when something goes right or wrong.
I will miss hearing them play together. I will miss being able to see them learn something at the actual moment it happens. From now on it will be "Guess what I learned today..."
It makes me sad.
But I will be able to sleep again.